Shame shame shame I know your name

So many things i could write about today...so many things I could muse or complain about. ... I am sitting here trying to figure out what to say and if I even want to use my energy up on the thought process of it all. I will admit that I am bothered by some peoples' audacity... I mean we are supposed to be in a more giving mood this time of year right? Aren't we supposed to more kind to one another? I mean more so now this time of the year than any other? Am i being completely ridiculous in my assumption of this? UGH! so now instead of writing at length on any one subject I am reduced to babbling about nothing really...sheesh. great job planetgurl.. great job..... Alright I am now going to try and get to a point.... *good idea* I have a low tolerance for fake people. that being said I also have NO ABILITY to be fake. If i can't handle being around you, i don't fake it, i just remove myself from the situation of your presence. Also if you ask me a question, i cant fake it, i cant lie to you, i will give you my honest opinion...so note to you, if you don't want an honest answer, don' t ask me. I wont offer it up unless I am asked, but once asked, i wont sugar coat it. I am not a bakery, I can't sugarcoat. I am too old to be fake. My time is too precious to waste.... also, a word to the wise, i am usually onto those type of people who are the fake ones, I can see RIGHT through your ridiculousness. I know what your ulterior motives are, you're not fooling me at all! While most people might buy into what you're selling, I am not buying it... so please don't treat me like a fool. I have allowed you to get away with it, until NOW. But my awareness of you is soooooo clear. CRYSTAL clear actually..... That being said, and maybe even long winded, I am done tolerating it. I have reached maximum capacity for bullcrap. I helped you, I brought you in and mentored you. I picked up your slack, without telling anyone I was helping out. I edified you, all of the time. Then you leave while flapping your mouth about how i was unfair to you and did nothing for you? SHAME ON YOU. Even while I heard these things I never spoke ill of you, i didn't say wonderful things, i just didn't say anything at all. You however, being immature and spiteful, just couldn't help yourself.... Then, as if that wasn't enough..you come into my "home" while I am away, and even make it a point to say that you're there BECAUSE i am not, to make yourself feel validated?! Shame on you~ SHAME SHAME SHAME on you! I am so over your childish actions. Honey, lets get ONE THING VERY STRAIGHT, you lack the years and experiences to try and get one over on me...you should just stop trying. I have loyalty and TRUTH on my side, what have you got? You may have a few friends that buy into your bullcrap, but it's been my experience that people who are shallow, disloyal and fake, usually attract the same kind of people...... I kind of feel sorry for you.... that's all for now, until next time....

late spring cleaning

Today i have been going through some stuff in my office..... I have encountered dust bunnies that may be the BIGGEST ever! I have come across some things that I haven't seen in forever.... and I have come across things i didn't even know existed... I have also come to conclude that i should have been keeping a WAY better pulse on some things around here... Some things have been riding the grey area it seems.... In fact, i feel like i have smacked right square in the jaw. I feel betrayed, and lied to.... all because the more I go through stuff, the more I realize someone hasn't been completely honest with some of the aspects of their role .... I am disappointed. I am not sure what to do with my new found knowledge... do i have a carpet call? or do i just let this pass? I am quite bothered by this dishonesty...and it's nothing like HUGE in the big picture, but it's the small stuff, and a lot of it really..... I guess all in good time..right? I will wait for an answer..... that's all for now, until next time...

Being an adult stinks sometimes.....DEAL WITH IT

today has been one of the day where I look at other adults in my world, REALLY?! You thought that was a great idea...huh? how did that one work out for ya? I am struggling today with the "actions" of other adults...I shouldn't concern myself with such things, I just can't seem to escape it today. There is ALWAYS someone who makes me crazy, I understand that, and usually I can deal with it mostly...but today i am kinda sick and tired of making excuse for other actions... This one's for YOU! (meaning, several adults I know) I am tired of those of you who think you can waltz in and out of either of my precious daughters' lives whenever the heck you want, leave your trail of disappointments, and broken promises, and go about your life like nothing happened, while I sit here and pick up the pieces, or worse yet, while I have to portray the part of the "bad guy" because I expect some decency from the likes of you! SHAME ON YOU! I am exhausted from making excuses for your ridiculous behaviors! I am sick and tired of you dumping your emotional baggage on them! I am sick and tired of being one of the few adults who has the courtesy to act my age. I am sick and tired of you blaming ME for your actions and faults... Pardon me for calling you out on something NOBODY has ever called you out on for the whole existence of your life..Excuse me for expecting you to be accountable for your actions, excuse me for expecting you to act like an adult! Until next time.....................

The gauntlet has been thrown

I have been sitting here the past few days thinking....yes, I know it's a dangerous pastime....
Anyhow I have thought about ALL kinds of things, but i keep coming back to the subjects of LOYALTY and HONESTY

I think both are lost in today's society...

People are selfish, they don't care about being LOYAL to anyone but themselves. If the situation can further their own selfish desires then ANYONE is game for being thrown under the Bus. Which is quite disturbing really. I would like to think that there is SOMEONE who can be trusted but, let's be honest, I am just not that naive. I have come to conclude that my spouse is the only one I can really lean on...He's the one PERSON i can truly trust. I can count on him to give me an honest opinion and not sugar coat for fear of me not liking it... and I KNOW WITHOUT A DOUBT that He has my back. (and he's not trying to stick a knife in it)True Story...
I think the Mob may have been onto something when they fitted liars and betrayers with cement shoes....just my opinion of course

I think women are the worst offenders of these two attributes, and I feel like I can say that since I am a woman, and I would have to say I know how we operate...with a little bit of strategery.

Women, for some reason, are terrible at being Loyal... especially with other women. It's like they are nice to your face, but you had better have tough skin, cause as soon as you turn, they are going to stab you, and beat you down with others. Women have you for lunch when you aren't there, they tear down your integrity and beat down your character. It's sad really.

It's like women NEED to do this on order to feel better about their own lousy lives.......its almost as if they have such a crappy perspective on their own life, that they have to bring other women's lives down too

Well I am here to let you know that it STOPS here. I am tired of hearing about it, I am TIRED of being one of your darn speed bumps thrown under the proverbial bus. I think that from now on I am going to call you out on it...I can no longer stand by, knowing you are feedin on me or any other woman, and pretend that everything is hunky dory. I can NOT and will NOT be the subject of your betrayal any longer. If you have something to say, then say it, but know this...you had best have FACT and not a bunch of gossiping lies or false accusations, as your foundation my friend. You had better come equipped with the TRUTH. Because I will be armed and ready with the TRUTH....
I am done being idle. I am done seeing fellow women be torn apart. I am done being the feast of your luncheons. I am just done.

You can leave my circle of "friends" because with friends like you, what on earth does a girl need enemies for.
I can't pretend everything is ok ANY longer, because its not. I can't be fake with you, and I am not. If i don't care for your presence I don't request it. I don't pretend to like you if i don't. I don't fake concern if I am not. I dont smile to your face while gossiping behind your back. I am a straight shooter and I guess it was just TOO much to expect you to return the favor. how about this, do me a favor and stop it. Just STOP. I am ok with having a few select friends who I know at the end of the day will stand the front lines with me. I would rather have that than the entire army of dishonest and disloyal cowards!
I am throwing the gauntlet...... either come at me with TRUTH or slink away and leave me be....... but if you bring it, you better be prepared for TRUTH to be tossed right back at you!
I am done venting for today...that's all for now..until next time

just something I am lousy at..No biggie

Today I had the honor of attending the funeral of a Lady I have know for many years....i kinda think of her as my proxy gramma. See, I have a best friend from childhood, and this woman was actually her Gramma, but she adopted me in as well. She was a no-nonsense kinda lady, and was a far cry from your traditional Gramma.....but that's another story....

As I was sitting at this funeral service I got to thinking......I suck at funerals, mostly due to the fact that my feelings are left in a jar beside my bed.....and I can't seem to get the sympathy thing down....I am quite awful at it...in fact most people know me for the phrase "rub some dirt in it" or "suck it up and pull up your big girl pants" Yeah, so...funerals, with the crying and the sympathy...I am lousy at them!

I also thought...why do we even have funerals? I mean really? I get the fact that the still living have to mourn...i TOTALLY understand that...but...i am not sure why we have funerals? They cost a boat load of money,and i think there could be other ways we could have "closure"
What about a celebration? I mean why cry about the death? Why not celebrate their life, and if your belief follows...celebrate that they are home! Sure we could cry about the memories, but to have to sit through the music, and the sermons (which are ALL different) it seems unneeded?

I am not claiming to know that THIS would be the best thing for anyone, but I am just sayin...

I would have to admit that to me, it seems that if a family is already grieving the loss of a loved one, why would we want to put even more financial burden on them by hosting a funeral and luncheon? Do you have any idea how much a funeral costs? Like really? Its a ton! And seriously on this note...WHY ON EARTH WOULD I NEED A VAULT for my DEAD body? It just doesn't seem logical.... grieving people aren't of sound mind to make financial decisions....

Now I can understand (to a point) that the sermon is a Pastor's way of giving the grieving family some hope during their difficult time...but a funeral to do that? I just don't get it... I can also see that perhaps the Pastor is trying to deliver a message of salvation to those sitting in the chairs that haven't heard it...I can see that, but really a funeral? Can't we think of any other way to do it?
Besides, (this is where I get a little "freakish") doesn't scripture say that Jesus told one man to "let the dead bury their dead" I mean i don't recall the big J.C. speaking at ANYONE'S funeral. He took his sermons on the road.....just sayin

I just don't get it, maybe i am weird like that....yeah, I probably am, and hey it's ok with me. If you want someone to straight shoot ya, I am THAT gal, if you need a shoulder to cry on, I could handle that, but if you're looking form someone to give you sympathy...I am going to have to pass.....but I will be upfront about it at least, and now days, That says something......
That's all for now, until next time...............

I am good with being uncool, really

What is it with some parents and their total lack of knowledge of what do when it comes to...PARENTING?
I mean. I am not claiming to know much about the subject myself, but I have to say that I feel like I have an ok handle on it...and while I know that I have not alot to gauge my self-proclaimed success on the subject, I feel like I am at least headed in the right direction.
I am basing this particular "rant" on my personal observations of other parents and their children. Now I understand that God blessed me with 2 daughters that are pretty amazing, and I also understand that even despite my inadequacies as a mom sometimes, my girls should turn out fine without too much therapy as adults :)
But as I have seen my teenage daughter grow, I have stood back and observed her friends and their parents...and I am now going to do a comparison, because frankly, thats what Moms do
I am one of those Moms who is usually pretty l laid back...if you adhere to my rules...I only have a few

1) no dating or boyfriends until you're 16 (yes I have to have both because my daughter will find a loophole, "well we aren't boyfriend/girlfriend or... It's not a date" so I am specific enough
2) I have TOTAL access to your social network accounts (i.e. FaceBook) I can log in at any time and check your stuff!!!
3) I have total access to your text messages (and deleting ANY will result in forfeiture of the phone)
4) your grades need to stay above C- (infractions will result in forfeitires of electronic priviledges in the least)
5) minor infractions (such as sassing back or giving me attitude ) will result in x amount of push-ups (she REALLY needs to work on upper body strength for hockey)

So far i would have to say that she has been pretty good about following our guidelines...
I think it helps that I am aware of who her friends are and what they are up to also...I am very involved in our community and so I hear almost everything that happpens at the middle school level....

lets stop here for a monent, while i shed some light on the parents who havent a clue of what is going on with our middle schoolers...
Our 6, 7, and 8th graders ARE HAVEING SEX AND USING DRUGS!!! This is a fact! Based on my own observations I can tell you who is sleeping with whom, and who just smoked pot during studyhall...some parents my think we have some time to talk to our kids about such topics, but truth is...we dont! our 12, 13, 14 year olds are already exposed to it!
I have told my daughter MANY times that I am totally good with being the "uncool" parent...I am going to be the PARENT..not her FRIEND. I am looking at the big picture, and while I may sound calloused at the time, I don't truly care if she is popular or not...I am doing my job....my job is to make sure she doesn't end up pregnant before she's done with college, and that she doesn't get a job as an exotic dancer, and that she has a rock solid foundation to raise her own family someday. She needs to have discernment to select a husband who will love her GENUINELY and not superficially.... if she doesn't achieve these things, then I will have failed as her PARENT

Anyhow, Back to the comparisons...as parents I think that we don't REALLY start to notice all of the differences until the kids are teenagers...then the differences come out in full force.
Most moms in this area know what my expectations of my daughters are and so if they are stepping out of line, I find out. However, there are some moms who are trying to live vicariously through their children so most rules are off, and to these mothers i am too hard on my daughters. THIS hinders my parenting slightly, since my daughter sees that her friend is getting away with WAY more than a teenager should ( in my opinion) and immediately thinks its "unfair" I can try and explain to her ALL day long that the world isn't about FAIR, but it's really a waste of my time, since she stops listening as soon as her sentence breaches her lips..... *sigh*

There is this one mother that TRULY i believe has NO CLUE...her daughter is the same age as my oldest, and they are in a handful of after school events together...so I see more than average .... I see how this girl behaves in the locker room, i see how other girls are treated by this girl, and I HEAR how this girl talks (she reminds me of that movie Mean Girls..and she's the ring leader)... but that's not all....
Her mother has 2 boys (in their early 20s) around this girl ALL OF THE TIME........really?!? That's the most mental thing I have ever heard! And they stay at this girl's house no less........i can tell you right now that not only would i NOT be encouraging a 20 something to be around my daughter I most certainly WOULD NOT allow that same boy to sleep under my roof GOOD GOD! I am amazed at how ridiculous some parents can be......this mothers lack of responsibility is making me crazy!

I know that this is just some crazy rant I have today and it may not even make any sense to you, and I may even be slightly biased about this mom since I think she's not very bright to begin with...however I HAD to get it out, It was making me nuts! I guess we shall see as time moves forward if my rantings have any substance to them.....i mean, we have ALL of high school yet.... *sigh*
That's all i have for now, until next time........

more time

I have decided that I really must make more time to write...
I was, for awhile, working shorter shifts, but I think those might be a blast of the past....

I do have some blog drafts waiting in the wings of my dashboard, maybe one of these days I will finish them and post like 3 in one day...wouldnt that be something?

Until that time, I had 2 minutes in my morning routine to spare, so I thought I would put it out there that I will really make some time to write, promise, cause holy smokes there is A TON going on right now that is blog worthy...
until then.....

We're off to a pretty Good Start......

WOW! I am already almost half way through the first month of the new year and I haven't written a thing? What on earth?!

Holidays were GREAT! The In-Law hosted event at our home went off without a hitch, and we had A TON of food leftover...but I loved snacking on it, so I was pleased. My little family appreciated all of the stuff underneath the tree....even the handmade items...BONUS!

I made this lip gloss (which is ridiculously simple) and my girls loved it...now I am passing it around to my lady friends...it feels nice to be able to say "I made that!"

Along the lines of making stuff, I have had some more free time lately...due to me trimming down my hours at one of our businesses....I needed to get my home in order...anyway....I have made, my own dish detergent (which ROCKS by the way), I am in process of making a laundry detergent as well....a nice fragrance one, I made this awesome stain remover for laundry ...SOOOOO SIMPLE, and I made my daughter some homemade shaving cream...I must admit I am feelin PRETTY domestic...almost like June Cleaver domestic but without the heels and apron.....

My laundry is all caught up, washed, dried, folded AND PUT AWAY!!! WOOHOO (insert little victory dance here) I am rearranging our downstairs to finish it for a family den...which is also going to rock! I have everything where I need it to be, which is so much less stressful.

I make well-planned home cooked meals every night for my family...which is so fulfilling.....

I have to say that this year is off to a great start! i hope this keeps up! I guess that's it for now...until next time!